If you look at me with hate in your heart, if you treat me like a burden, I will shine brighter than the brightest light of that you can be certain. For each hateful word, and mal-intended action directed outward, my love will grow so strong within that my light will counter all hatred. -TF

What can you do when you feel alone and you look around and the world feels like it is in chaos? When true connection with others is scarce because superficial relationships bred online are fed through “likes,” right swipes, and “follows.”

Thanks to the  news we have gruesome video and audio footage of the injustice in the world and it becomes increasingly difficult to keep from falling into a depressive and helpless state. Many would rather go off and be on an island alone than to face the current state of civilization. At a time when many are feeling lonely and detached, we are faced with the reality that, there is a lot of sadness and hatred in our present day America. So how do we stay positive when we are inundated with negativity throughout each day?

Many potential clients reach out sharing that their hearts hurt. They feel connected to the world and therefore feel the pain and heaviness of others. Some identify as HSP (highly sensitive people), others as Empath’s who can feel emotional and physical symptoms of others and of the world. In Judith Orloff’s book, The Empath’s Survival Guide, she shares tools on how Empath’s can protect their energy and use their empathic abilities to support others.

Other clients who are not necessarily bought into the the idea of people being Empaths, are also reporting feeling negatively impacted by the state of the world because it seems like there is one unfortunate event after another leaving them to experience symptoms of anxiety and/or depression. They are feeling as if the world is unsafe and unfair. They are searching for something to make them feel safe, give them hope, bring them happiness, and return their faith in humanity.

So what can we do? How do we stay strong? How do we ensure that we are protecting our individual light? We stay positive! I recognize it is not an easy task but the only way to counter darkness is with light. We have to counter the negative energy with positive energy. Inner light, despite our surroundings. A positive energy that can reside within you regardless of external factors.

5 THINGS YOU CAN DO TODAY TO PROTECT YOUR ENERGY and SPREAD LOVE

1. Do NOT internalize: Create a Positive Mantra. You do not get to take it personally. Recognize that we are a part of a collective, none of us stand alone. Rather than give into the hate, and retaliate/react with an equally hateful remark, remind yourself that it is not about you, it is about whoever is doing or saying something hurtful. You are not the one who was carrying hate in your heart, they are. You are responsible for your own energy. Create a mantra or statement that will help you stay grounded and remind you that you do not have to get sucked into someone else’s negative energy/bad mood. Examples of mantra’s are: “In this moment, I choose love,” “I am responsible for my own energy and I choose to stay positive,” or “I am love and light, no one has the power to suck me into their darkness”. You have a choice in that moment, to either keep your positive energy/light or to get sucked into someone else’s negativity. You get to decide.

2. Be Altruistic. For every negative slur spewed, share something positive. Give what you can in your own unique way. It does not have to be on a grand scale (although it can be). The most important thing is to remember that you are light and you can help others. We all have the ability to spread love. Some examples are, taking someone else’s shift at work, donating clothing, starting a food drive, helping out an elderly neighbor. It can also be as simple as giving someone a compliment, saying thank you, holding a door open for someone, or smiling while giving eye contact to another person. It can be as grand as being a hands on active supporter of a cause you feel passionate about. As long as you are giving, sharing, and supporting from a place of love, you are sharing and spreading light.

3. Be in Nature. Go for a walk barefoot in the grass (earthing), touch a tree, swim in a lake, sit on the sand, feed an animal, water a plant. Visit a park with various plant life and lakes (if you live in New York City, stroll through Central Park in Manhattan or visit the New York Botanical Garden in the Bronx). Nature is soothing, it will feed your soul. Allow yourself to embrace the beauty in the world, because beauty does exist in the world. Even though there are what feels like heartbreaking things happening in your personal life as well as the world around you, give yourself permission to experience the beauty. If you can not go into nature, take a cold shower or a warm bath and allow the water to cleanse your body and energy. Listen to calming springs, winds, rainfall on a sound machine or with a phone app, allow your mind to visualize the beauty you appreciate. You can bring nature into your home with a plant, a fish, fresh flowers, etc. What you consume can also connect you to nature, such as fresh fruits and vegetables, water and herbal tea. 

4. Connect with others. Connection matters. In person, face to face, with touch, and laughter but beware of energy vampires (see the next step #5 regarding boundaries) who may dump negative energy on you. Rather seek out individuals who are uplifting and have a similar goal of wanting to spread and share in positive vibes. It matters. Instead of a text, invite a friend over, or meet for coffee, or my a personal favorite, pizza and wine. If you are struggling to get some of the people you know to meet up in person, meet new people! Find a Meetup! Either on Meetup.com or you can download the app to your phone and get started connecting with like minded people right now! Positive energy breeds positive energy and the more you put out, the more you will attract. If you can not meet in person, consider meeting online for a virtual date. The key is to have positive, connecting interactions.

5. Create Healthy Boundaries You do this by being in tune with your body. Recognizing when an interaction is having a negative effect on you. Your body will send you signals, rapid heart beat, a knot in your stomach, tightness in your chest, a pain in the back of your neck, shortness of breath, a headache that comes out of nowhere. If you are interacting with others one on one, or in an environment such as a social setting, at work, or commuting and begin to feel drained, nervous, or uncomfortable, you get to create a healthy boundary. If you are on a phone call, make a decision to get off of the phone, if you are in an environment that can not be changed, visualize a protective shield or bubble that surrounds you and does not allow the energy of others to penetrate. If you have toxic people in your life, begin to limit contact with them. Pay attention to the signals your body gives you, it is constantly speaking to you and letting you know what it needs. Many of us have gotten comfortable with being uncomfortable, I encourage you to create a way to find comfort within, despite external factors.

There are enough things that will happen in your life that you will not have control over. The two things that we do have control over, are our energy and our reactions. We ultimately get to decide if we will keep our energy and our reactions positive.

This blog was written with an intent to instill hope, and as a reminder that when we experience hate in our lives, rather than falling into the deep abyss of depression, or retaliating with an action rooted in hate, we get to pull from our inner light, from a place of trust, and overpower the hate with love. Remember, hate breeds hate, love conquers it!

“Hate is not conquered by hate; hate is conquered by love. This is a law eternal.” -Buddha

“Darkness cannot drive out darkness, only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate, only love can do that.” – Martin Luther King Jr. 

“It is better to light a candle, than to curse the darkness” – Eleanor Roosevelt

“Light up the darkness” – Bob Marley